170

I attended a meeting last Monday night with 169 other men.  A meeting at my church focused on being a better Dad to daughters.  Record attendance for the “Pursuit” series, a series of meetings focused on how we can  “do life” better.  Along with the attendance, record puzzled looks, record note taking, and record roundtable discussion.

I came away from this meeting somewhat scared, maybe overwhelmed (I only have a 3 and 7 year old) yet thinking “what an awesome, incredible responsibility I have as a Dad.”   Huge responsibility and fortunately still time to focus on intentionality in parenting as we seek to raise two ladies to contribute to society.

This wasn’t men telling men how to manage their daughters – this was mostly heartfelt content and insight supplied by daughters – the experts.  Here we were - a group of individuals that are supposed to have all the answers, hearing the answers from ones like our own and wow – did it make for a quiet room.   When do they get a cell phone?  I still don’t know that but I will text you between getting their ears pierced and their first date.

A meeting series entitled “You Have What It Takes”.  Right.  Thanks for the manufactured optimism to offset my ingrained cynicism.  Hey, maybe I do have what it takes and if I don’t maybe I can steal yours for a moment.  Can I?  Yes, unless I am holed up in my basement, my job search cockpit.  What I am saying is the content was invaluable but the sharing with others completely enhanced the content.

Mr. Unemployed or Ms. Unemployed, I am writing to you.  You need a roundtable filled with a few of your peers.  You need to be quiet and listen like you have never listened before yet you also need to speak up.  Do you have a safe roundtable in your life where you can pull up a chair?  You have something to contribute even if you think you don’t.  You do.

Perspective, affirmation, reassurance – all the intangibles we rarely, if ever admit we need and then some – that you only gain from getting out there and mixing it up with others in a similar situation.   By the way, we aren’t talking a bitch session – we are talking about a finding solutions together session.

Plenty of information out there to consume, take in and process but how about this.  What about the discussion?  I don’t mean you need to sign-up for more webinars rich in content – I am talking about showing up so your fellow man and woman can pull that rich content out of you.  I am convinced there is a wannabe thought leader inside all of us if we just let it out.  You have a sphere of influence.  They need influenced – so go activate that sphere.  They need your thoughts, they need your perspective.

Find some people to manufacture some optimism with right now.  Do this job search better with others.

(I put this into practice yesterday with a group of men in career transition and in the next blog post – I will share my observations.)